The Stork Visited Ewan Today!

Hello Family and Friends,

Ewan received a happy healthy pink package at 2:14am this morning (4/24/14).

Darby Moira McDonald joined our family in a flash (less than 3 hours start to finish), weighing in at 9 pounds 3 ounces and measuring 20 inches.

Thus far she is a sweet little lady and we are all in love. Everyone is doing well and now our adventure as a family of 4 begins!

Cheers,
Kevin, Peri & Ewan

A Dance with Ewan

Some day, when Ewan selects the partner of his choice, and decides to get married, or celebrates in some other way that would give me an excuse to have a public dance with him, I want to dance to this song.

"Where You Lead" – Written and Performed by Carole King

Wanting you the way I do

I only want to be with you

And I would go to the ends of the earth

'Cause, darling, to me that's what you're worth

Where you lead, I will follow

Anywhere that you tell me to

If you need, you need me to be with you

I will follow where you lead

If you're out on the road

Feeling lonely and so cold

All you have to do is call my name

And I'll be there on the next train

Where you lead, I will follow

Anywhere that you tell me to

If you need, you need me to be with you

I will follow where you lead

I always wanted a real home with flowers on the window sill

But if you want to live in New York City, honey, you know I will

I never thought I could get satisfaction from just one man

But, if anyone could keep me happy, you're the one who can

And where you lead, I will follow

Anywhere that you tell me to

If you need, you need me to be with you

I will follow where you lead

When Ewan first came home from the hospital we spent a lot of time on the couch --- cuddling and sleeping and eating and healing. Often the television was on in the background, and commonly my favorite show ("The Gilmore Girls") was on, and while the lyrics can read a little creepy when discussing your son, to me they conjure the relationships in that show and the realities of motherhood, plus she sings it with her daughter in most versions. 

An episode of "The Gilmore Girls" seems to play in our house at least once a day and I swear when Ewan hears the song he stops and looks at me and his eyes say, "mama, remember when I was little and we used to watch this together." For the rest of his life I feel like saying something about "when he was little will" make me tear up --- he has me.   

Baby Blanket

1 week before my due date, which ended up being 2 weeks before Ewan was born, I started knitting this blanket. I knew that I wanted to knit my baby a blanket, but in all the other baby preparation my knitting sort of fell to the side. I knew I would not finish it before Ewan arrived, but I did not expect it to take me 6 months to finish! Many people have commented that they thought I would spend my maternity leave knitting, but I sort of spent it taking care of my baby, so again my knitting was
de-prioritized.

In almost 5 years of knitting (learning was my new years resolution in 2008) I have knit many many patterns, but I think this may be the best pattern I have ever used. The instructions were clear, the chart easy to read, and the images beautiful. The pattern was written by Brooklyn Tweed (aka Jared Flood) and it will definitely not be the last of his that I use. The blanket is the tweed baby blanket, and I did the small version using a dark blue and a grey yarn from a favorite, Sundara Yarn.

My hope is that Ewan will love snuggling in this blanket as much as I loved making it... while he was kicking in my belly and napping in his crib.

The day we met our son...

I have hesitated to write any level of birth story because that day is so immensely sacred to Kevin and I. Recently I have been haunted by the thought that I will forget the details, so here is a short and sweet highlight for the sake of Ewan's history.

The hardest part about the end of my pregnancy was the constant calls and texts questioning his arrival. I reassured everyone I would not keep it a secret, but they still asked daily (or more), this boy has been so loved since before he even arrived. Once the due date (March 1st) came and went these questions only multiplied. The funny thing was that I wasn't even anxious for Ewan to come, I knew he would when he was ready and all the nonstress tests were perfect so I just wanted my boy to choose his time. I was very lucky to be comfortable for the duration of my pregnancy, my doctor credits my height for this, the worst part was trying to roll from one side to the other in my sleep with my hips settled and a nearly 10 pound baby resting in my pelvis.

The morning of March 7th I woke up to go to the bathroom and had a very weird feeling in my stomach, it went away and I was quickly back to sleep. The next morning (March 8th, 41 weeks pregnant) I woke up at the exact same time, 5:05am, with the same pain. Sure it would go away I got back in bed and waited through 3 similar pains before waking Kevin. He immediately asked me how far apart the pains were and of course I had no clue so we whipped out the trusty contraction app to realize they were about a minute long every 5 minutes, exactly the threshold our doctor told us to come in at. We wondered what happened to all that prelabor at home stuff we had been told about. By this time it was about 6:00am, and being the ever calm man Kevin sent an email to work saying he wouldn't be in, called the doctor to give her a heads up, took a shower, and packed the rest of my things - all while I laid in bed denying the reality that this would be the day (or the day before depending on how labor went) that I would meet my son. I then mustered up the energy to take a shower, to shave my legs, and to take one last belly shot.

Barefoot and 41 weeks pregnant in our not
quite complete nursery!

By the time we left the house it was a quarter after 7:00am, not the perfect time to be headed southbound on the 101, but oh well this would be our last car ride as a couple so that time in the car was pretty special, we were headed to meet our boy.

My calm cool collected man.

When we arrived at the hospital it was just about 8:00am and the contractions were a solid minute plus and 4 minutes apart. We didn't want to do the valet so we parked our car and headed in. I refused the wheel chair and walked up to labor and delivery, a bit overwhelmed I waited patiently as they checked us in and headed to the monitoring room to check progress. Baby was perfect and I was told I had been working hard and was already 4 centimeters. I was offered the ability to officially be admitted or wander around for awhile, at first I thought I would wander, but didn't want to be exhausted so opted to check-in, so to labor and delivery room 1 we went.

When I couldn't remember to push start I
figured we were good on stats.

The next 4.5 hours are a bit of a blur: we texted a few folks to let them know the status, chatted a lot, the epidural was administered, we watched movies (the dilemma and grown ups) on the entertainment station in our room, surfed the Internet a bit, and played Scrabble on our iPhones while things progressed and contractions continued.

My doctor came in at 1:40pm, when I was supposed to have my next checkup at her office, and I was 8.5 centimeters, so she broke my water. She let me know she would come back at the end of her day to check on us or they would call her based on progress, but that if I delivered after 5:00pm it would be her partner with me, I didn't want that but knew I couldn't control it. Kevin went to get a quick bite per the nurses suggestion and within minutes I was texting him to come back and calling my nurse. When my water broke the flood gates literally opened and this boy was coming. My nurse called the doctor back, she hadn't even made it out of the hospital compound yet, but had to go all the way around due to construction. She came back, took a look, and quickly jogged for scrubs.

Once the pushing began I literally couldn't stop it. Minimal rests were taken between contractions and a little over 10 hours from my first contraction, less than 2 hours after my water was broken, and less than an hour after the pushing started in earnest, Ewan Porter McDonald was born, at 3:33pm to be exact. He measured 22 inches, weighed 9 pounds 13 ounces, and it became obvious very quickly that this world would never be the same.

Ewan after a quick weigh, measure, and clean.

We scheduled visitors for the next day so that after Ewan was all cleaned up we could spend our first evening as a family of three quietly nestled in our hospital room soaking each other in and celebrating together with hugs and kisses and quiet acknowledgement of our miracle.

Our family!

Ewan's first shampoo - lather, rinse, repeat. 

All tucked in for his first night of sleep.

And on Saturday, March 10th we headed home!

Remembering Gracie

Last week my sister's family had to say goodbye to their dog Gracie. I have a special spot in my heart for that puppy, afterall she was my first niece.

Gracie I will always remember and appreciate you as the sweet girl that you were: such a good cousin to Barley and Coco teaching them to strip the fuzz off their toys, always returning our socks when you borrowed them for play time, and the unforgettably hilarious scream you elicited from your grandma when you stole that steak from the table on Christmas Eve.

You were truly one of a kind and we will throw a few tennis balls for you.

Gracie - February 2010

Mother's Day

Being a mom is so new to me, but it feels so warm and cozy.

During my pregnancy I thought a lot about the kind of mama I wanted to be and what mattered, what I came up with is pretty simple. My mothering style is to exude unconditional love and what matters is that Ewan grows up to be a good man. The End.

I may not always know what is right but I can always give my son genuine love and an unwavering sense of security, and always just know I am doing my very best --- with that I don't think I can go wrong, sure he will hate me some days, but even on those days I will love him.

I have approached each day that I have with Ewan with one goal in mind, aside from not breaking him, that he know he is loved. And in the vein of the best mama advice I have received yet, courtesy of my Bestie Whit (you can meet her here), who I believe heard it from her mama, being a mother is not hard it is just constant --- so constant love it is!